One Race to Qualify
How Marywood’s Milana Straub’s qualified to nationals in her first cross country race
The air in Lock Haven, Pa. was buzzing with excitement ahead of the 2022 Mid-Atlantic Regional Cross Country Championships. The postseason was in full swing, and teams and athletes were beginning their journeys toward the coveted NCAA national meet. In order to leave no stone unturned and no footing unsurveyed, athletes ran their warmups on the course, leaning into the camaraderie of teammates to calm pre-race jitters.
One such athlete was Milana Straub. From the outside, Straub looked like every other athlete preparing for the regional meet. She warmed up with her Marywood teammates, ran through her stretching routine, and put her best foot forward on the starting line.
But what set Straub apart from the rest was that this was the first time she had ever been on a cross country course. In fact, the regional championship meet was her very first cross country race.
“I was on the line thinking ‘these women have been doing this since 7th grade. How am I gonna do this?’” Straub said. “And then I realized that I am not seven years late to the party, but instead I have seven years of energy built up inside of me to just go. So I just went.”
She was through the first mile in 5:54, sitting at 21st behind a pack of Johns Hopkins athletes that ran seven-deep. By 3k, she had moved up to 12th place, which put her in the company of XC national qualifier Cassie Carr of Washington & Jefferson. It was around this point in the race that her coach, Dylan Gearinger, screamed at her that she was going to nationals. A surprised and somewhat annoyed Straub recalls rolling her eyes at Gearinger, believing he was overexaggerating. She tried to count places to see where she was, but couldn’t quite tell. Nevertheless, she kept moving up in the race.
A little later, Marywood Assistant Coach Kevin Borrelli yelled similar encouragement at her, causing Straub to start to believe that what her coaches were saying might actually be true. She crossed through the 5k in 18:47, a full 13 seconds faster than her 5k PR on the track. She realized she was in the top 15, but with enough race left, expected the more experienced runners to catch her before the finish line.
They never did. Straub finished seventh overall with a time of 22:22. She beat Carr as well as Susquehanna’s Kallan Carter, both of whom made the NCAA meet last year. She was the fourth individual qualifier to the NCAA meet behind Scranton’s Jessica Hoffmann, Stevenson’s Isabelle Pardew, and Alvernia’s Cera Gaston.
As soon as she got off the line, an excited Gearinger confirmed to Straub that she was going to nationals. “I just didn't really believe him,” Straub said.”I thought it was some sort of fluke.”
It was no fluke–Straub qualified to the most prestigious meet of the NCAA D3 cross country season in her first cross country race ever.
An athlete by nature
Straub is no stranger to sports–from a young age she has been involved in just about every sport that comes to mind. She played baseball, soccer, softball, and sideline cheerleading. She was an all-star competitive cheerleader. In eighth grade, she picked up field hockey.
“Even when I wasn’t in a uniform, I was swimming, walking, and biking as a kid,” she said. “I just love movement.”
Halfway through high school, Straub added track and field to the lineup. While she never ran cross country, she gravitated toward the 1600m distance event. Her best time from high school was 5:42, a time which she eventually improved upon in just one season of college track for Marywood, having run 5:22 in the mile indoors and 5:09 in the 1500m outdoors. She also ran the outdoor 5k in 19:02.
Though this trajectory to an outstanding 2022 cross country season seemed fairly predictable given her apparent athleticism, Straub’s progression to a spot on the regional start line was anything but linear. In high school, Straub struggled with race anxiety, exercise addiction, and anorexia.
“Right before COVID started was when I started exhibiting some unhealthy behaviors, maybe like January of 2020.” Straub said. “Just running too much, not eating enough, not taking care of myself. And that's a really slippery slope. It was subtle, but it happened so quickly.”
Straub eventually became very sick and was given an ultimatum: hospital or high school. She also started to face the realization that if she had to be removed from school, she would also be removed from sports. Currently heavily involved with both field hockey and track, Straub faced a harsh reality that her disorder could mean the demise of both.
“That news just really hit me in the face one day: I wouldn’t be an athlete anymore,” she said. “That’s what really lit a fire underneath me to get it together.”
After some progress with recovery, Straub was permitted to participate in field hockey again her senior year with cooperation, but still struggled with obsessive and compulsive behaviors. This challenge is what led her to Marywood University.
A Marywood Pacer
Located in Scranton, Pa., Marywood was just under an hour away from Straub’s hometown of Shickshinny, Pa. Now starting to look at potential colleges but also still struggling with aspects of her recovery, Straub decided a college within an hour radius of home would be best. She had heard great things about Marywood so decided to reach out to the field hockey coach, Julie Trott.
Trott came to watch Straub play in a field hockey game, and Straub recalled an instant connection. She noted that in that interaction, she saw in Trott’s eyes how badly she wanted to succeed. Straub visited soon after and then texted Coach Trott from the parking lot that she wanted to be a Marywood Pacer.
In her first season, Straub, a forward, was named Atlantic East Offensive Player of the Week. She led her team to two wins with four goals and one assist, pulling off a hat trick in their game against Bryn Athyn. However, despite her successes and enjoyment toward being a college athlete, something was missing. Straub found herself missing the track.
“I didn't want to run track, I had no intentions,” she said. “But then I thought about not running track and that didn't sit well with me.”
A curious Straub navigated to Marywood’s track and field website where she found contact information for then-head cross country and track and field coach Rob Ahrens. She reached out to Ahrens, who found her high school 1600m times and quickly concluded he would be happy to have her join the team.
Straub’s research did not stop there either. She recalls looking up times for everybody on Marywood’s roster. She realized she would be the second best miler on the team behind Katie Shea. Straub sought advice about what to do from her mother, who told her she wouldn’t be stalking the roster if she wasn’t interested.
A runner once more
Straub told Coach Ahrens she would give track a try and started showing up at practices. Though excited about running college track, she was still struggling with race and workout anxiety. Thoughts about not being able to keep up with Shea and fears about her commitment to running compared to others started to creep in. She was fully transparent with her coach about her history and current struggles, and he agreed to work with her to help ease her back into competition safely.
“We kind of took it easy on me and had me dip my toes in,” Straub said. “When I felt comfortable, we changed my paces, let me run a little bit more, and steadily got me into more workouts. Eventually, I just felt better. I talked with my coaches and teammates a lot about why I'm here and why I want to be here. And we just all collectively worked to fix my relationship with running.”
In high school, Straub only allowed herself to run the 1600m because of race nerves, but now she was finally gaining the confidence to branch out. She ran a 3k, an 800, a 4x800m relay, and a DMR. She set a new PR of 5:41 in the mile. Her coaches pushed her to consider the 5k outdoors, and, after dedication to daily affirmations, Straub complied, finding that she actually enjoyed the longer distance.
“My relationship with running took a wonderful turn,” Straub said. “Racing was still hard in the spring, but there came a turning point for me. I just knew I wanted to do this and I wanted to love doing it the way everyone else does.”
Now two and a half years recovered, Straub credits her coaches and her teammates for helping her get to where she is today.
She explained that Coach Ahrens was patient with her process and committed to being consistent with race affirmations. “If I had a good run, we talked about it. If I had a bad run, we talked about it,” Straub said. “We talked about more reasonable expectations for myself. Making me say three positive things about a race afterwards, even if I didn't believe that he would give me things to say. And eventually it just started feeling more genuine.”
Coach Borrelli was the one who inspired Straub to pursue cross country. He approached her after the conference championship meet last spring encouraging her to try it out. Straub laughed when she recalled this moment. She initially told him “no way,” but now expresses that she can’t repay him for pushing her to try it.
For it was cross country that also led Straub to some of her closest friends and teammates. She explained that even though she missed the majority of cross country meets due to hockey games, her teammates came to her games to cheer for her. They bought shirts from a NEDA (National Eating Disorders Association) fundraiser she had organized through the hockey team and wore awareness bows during their race while Straub was at her game.
“I’d just say the people that love me and want to see me do well are my biggest influencers, and I’m so thankful to be a cross country runner because of them,” Straub said.
Perhaps the most influential in Straub’s journey has been her mother. Straub explained that her mom has sent her daily encouragement via text message every day for the past year. She has also had a large impact on pushing Straub to seek recovery when she was struggling the most with anxiety and eating disorder.
When the summer before cross country hit, Straub admitted that she wasn't doing exactly what she was supposed to. Her mother posed another ultimatum: hospital or college. If she didn’t get better, Straub would have to stay home and do online school.
“When you're in that kind of state, you're so unhappy,” Straub said. “No matter what you're chasing, you're not happy. So my mom kind of forced me, but I'm very grateful, obviously.”
It was that same summer that Gearinger, a 2018 D3 national champion in the 3k from Haverford, accepted the head cross country and track & field coaching position at Marywood. He and Straub would start working together as Straub began her first cross country season at Marywood.
“Dylan is one of the best pieces of my life now,” she said. “Our energies match, it’s almost scary. I’m so thankful to have him in my corner. We’re gonna do big things together.”
In his debut season as a college cross country coach, Gearinger had three individuals qualify to the NCAA meet: Straub, sophomore Jack Baronski, and freshman Michael McCann. Straub was the highest placer of the three at the NCAA meet, placing 102nd in the women’s race.
A national qualifier
Though it would have been easy for prior negativities to creep in, Straub reflected on how far she has come from her younger days to the NCAA meet.
“I didn't really notice any growth or positivity in high school,” she said. “I feel like just having that and knowing that past me wouldn't have been happy with this season at all, I'm really thankful that we put in all that mental work, so I can put my name on it and be happy.”
Straub intends to focus mostly on the longer distances this track season, with a heavy concentration on the 5k, steeplechase, and 10k outdoors. She also hinted that her fall schedule will include a lot more cross country races.
While many of her goals are performance-based, one intention sticks out with her the most.
“We all take so much for granted every day,” she said. “College running has allowed me to actively work on breaking this habit.”